Personal Power

One of my failings is my willingness to give up my personal power. I've spent the entire day feeling guilty for calling in to work, and tomorrow I face another day of guilt. But, today was valuable for me. I realized that this job is an opportunity for me to learn how to navigate very difficult situations without losing my self: a very difficult challenge, indeed.

Now, just to make perfectly clear that this situation really is difficult, and not just made-up drama, you must realize that at least half of my time is spent listening to my fellow managers complain about the CEO, and he complain about them. These are never conversations that I never start -- I've been meticulous about that, and I spend 80 percent of my time trying to convince the other managers just how short-sighted they are. But what these conversations confirm is that I'm not the only one struggling with dealing with our CEO.

What tends to happen with me is that I give over all my power and then reach a point where I resent it and do something drastic to try and balance the power in the relationship. That is not a productive pattern. So, while I try to find another job I'm going to work on maintaining my personal power.

But, I think the decision is clear that I have to find another job. I'm going to go insane listening to these people bitch about one another.