Disappointment

I've discovered that RP is, indeed, human -- and not a particularly decent one.

From what I can gather: Six months he unceremoniously dumped his boyfriend of six months. Said boyfriend, PL, from all accounts was devastated. Now, understand, I'm not especially a fan of PL's. He's vain and needy and condescending. I have to admit that I got a tiny bit of pleasure from the knowledge that his relationship with RP ended dramatically. To get over the pain, PL threw himself into his work and workouts and managed to find another boyfriend. And now RP is all over PL. Tonight at rehearsal they were virtually inseparable. But because PL is vain and needy and condescending, RP will eventually dump him again; and this time I'm not taking any pleasure in what is sure to be nasty.

On top of that, for the first time, ever, I am standing next to RP for one of the songs, and he took some rather thinly veiled digs at me. And with the same amount of lilt in my voice I dished it right back.

Of course I knew the character I'd created in my head didn't really exist, and have been prepared from the beginning for the sad moment when RP would actually become human. I guess the disappointment is that the fantasy that I've enjoyed for over a year is dissolving and there's nothing on the horizon to replace it. Ah, back to Ben Affleck.